What It Means to Have Two Babies at the Same Time

DSC_7951-18_WEBOnly one pregnancy but two babies!

One pregnancy but a lot more risk, worry, and monitoring.

Both mom and dad get to hold and hug a baby. No jealousy.

If multiple visitors come over, there are two babies to hold and snuggle. Babies all around!

Every time I give one baby a big hug, I feel the need to give the other baby a hug too, lest he feel left out. Same with saying I love you, cooing over cuteness, etc.

When one baby is making developments/meeting milestones, I worry about the other one if he’s not.

When I need to take them upstairs to nap and can only take one at a time, I have to think who I carried up first last time. I don’t want to always do one first and make the other one feel left out.

Same thing when they wake up from a nap–who to take first and make sure I’m alternating. (Our nanny has the same thoughts on this one, by the way.)

It is quite a feat to feed and burp two babies at once. Especially if you’re simultaneously pumping.

I worry about posting pictures unevenly, and as a corollary I often purposely alternate individual shots of them.

As another corollary, I’ll take similar shots of each and make a diptych so I’m not showing photographic favor of one over the other.

I don’t always like listing out their developments (even in my head) because inevitably one does something first and I don’t want the other one to feel bad. You know, in fifteen years when they’re reading internet antiques through their mind chips.

When they were itty bitty newborns, I could put both of them on my chest at once. Holding one baby on your chest is awesome. Two is exponentially more awesome.

I can’t pick up both of them at the same time (or at least not without hurting myself). So if they’re both crying, I can’t equally comfort them both.

I can sit down and hug them both. As they’ve gotten older, though, they’ve gotten not just bigger but also squirmier, so it’s tough to keep them both in my lap.

They will now try to comfort their upset brother: Hugs, gentle pats, fetching of lovey or bottle.

It’s a calculated risk to change one diaper because the other baby/toddler is now free to get into mischief.

They fight over toys. Even if they are both holding identical toys, each wants brother’s toy.

Every time you go to buy something, you have to decide if you should buy only one, or if you really need two.

The cost of most everything doubles. And/or, things last half as long.

Sometimes things come in sets of two already, which feels like a secret hat tip to twin parents.

Double strollers, though they can be great for what they are, will always be way more unwieldy than single strollers.

You can’t–well, I can’t–push a double stroller and a grocery cart at the same time. Therefore going shopping before they’re old enough to sit up in a cart is pretty much a no-go.

Once they are big enough for the cart, only one baby can sit in it, while the other baby has to be stuck in a carrier. (Except for Costco with their double carts!)

It’s really hard to take two babies to a class or solo outing. For one, you have to make sure that you can take one out of the stroller and leave the other one safely. Then, you have twice the work and twice the weight to carry/adjust.

They crawl and walk in opposite directions.

They entertain each other and themselves.

They will play by themselves, independently.

If they’re both into mischief, you can’t carry them both away. Once you move one, the other has gone back into the mischief, so you move that one, but the first made it back again…etc etc.

If one wakes up crying in the middle of the night, he might wake up the other one. If so, you can only pick up one at a time. Which then means a terrible cycle of pick one up and calm him, listen to the other cry. Put first one down, pick up and calm the second one, first one starts crying again. And so on.

If one makes some noise in the middle of the night, you may not know who it is unless they’re still actively crying.

They may not nap at the same time, or for the same amount of time. Which means that you can’t always bank on naptime for things like cleaning, reading, tv, or mama naptime.

If one is sick, both have to stay home from daycare.

The pediatrician co-pays really add up fast with two babies who rotate getting sick.

You don’t always have time or brainpower to use their names, and refer to them as ‘this one’ and ‘that one.’

When you pick up two babies from daycare, that means two sweet faces to light up, and two sets of little legs to crawl or toddle over, and two sets of little arms to hug you.

Nothing is ever easy with twins.

Life is never boring with twins!

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20 thoughts on “What It Means to Have Two Babies at the Same Time

  1. Great post. Exactly my experience so far. Though I do occasionally go shopping with a shopping cart and a double stroller. Not exactly efficient or fun, but possible. I cannot wait until mine walk. I keep thinking it will get a bit easier then, though I know a lot of things will probably get harder.

    • Yeah, things always change and get both harder and easier. Guess that’s the permanent paradox of parenting! That’s awesome that you can do the stroller+cart! I don’t have the patience or the hand/arm strength for that. Once your babies are sitting up well, get one of them into the cart seat!

  2. LOL @ “This one and That one”! I love this, so true 😉 Kudos to Sparrow above who can push a cart and double stroller at once! I was never able to do that. I’m only able to get groceries when I find one of those double carts, if the store doesn’t have one…forget it, I’ll go back home. Thank God for Costco & Sams!

    • We just recently went to Costco with ours (with all four of us), and it was so great to have them both in the same cart! Sometimes we use the double carts at Target, but they tend to slip down a bit in there.

  3. Just push the stroller and pull the cart! That’s what I do. I hit things often with the cart, but hey, I still get a lot of super mom comments 🙂 Mine are one year old and it’s awesome; I can’t imagine just having one 🙂

    • That’s awesome–you must have built up lots of arm strength from that! Our double stroller can’t really be pushed with only one hand, so I am impressed! Congrats on making it to one year–two babies are pretty great, aren’t they? 🙂

  4. I can relate to every single line! My twins hit one year next week and it has been an exhausting, challenging year. But more than that, it’s been the most fun, amazing year of my life! (and I’m 41, so I have some years under my belt). I agree with Kylee above… I can’t imagine having just one.

  5. I feel like you are blogging about my life… Mine are going to be 17 Months next week and we are in South Africa. Being a twin mom is the most rewarding and challenging thing I have ever done, I really wish i documented my boys lives as well as you have. They grow so fast! Thank you for your blog and please don’t end it anytime soon!

  6. Pingback: Motherhood: I’m doing it ALL WRONG | We Have Twins?!

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